Being Single Parent
- 24 February 2015
This week I had the opportunity to feel the role as a single parent, that is when my husband had to get out of the island up to 4 days. This opportunity can actually be viewed within two points of view: in positive and negative way. In positive way, this opportunity is the time to try to become a single parent, feel the stress and the commotion in becoming a single parent. And from negative standpoint, I only feel the burden.
Yes, a very heavy burden. Especially if you and your kid have to survive with little money. In other side, my son is a homeschool kid, I educate him myself, it is certainly different than schooled children. When children go to school, mother can have time to herself, or to take care of the house. But not for parent with homeschooled children, no exact time to be alone.
The longing for my husband is one aspect that is very affecting my emotional condition. This emotion affecting my child and my work too. Melancholy, moodiness, are aspects that I have to handle carefully.
Phew! This is so stressful. I am very amazed with single parents who can survive and successfully educating and caring for their children happily.
In this article I will not share any tips, I'll just share my experiences... excited and emotional experiences, that make me have to stay away from any social media and just concentrate to only take care of my family and my work.
Single Parent Means Whole Time For Children
Normally, I share the parenting time with my husband. But this time, the whole time my son was with me. All questions and interaction only with me. He need me as his mother and also his father.
Single Parent Means Team Up With Children
Not only being a leader for children, a single parent must be able to team up with them. The team up is to share the tasks of the house work. The house work would be better if delegated to the children. You only need to customize the task with the child's ability, but also do not underestimate your child, you have to recognize the ability of your child.
Single Parent Means Organizing The Family Financial By Yourself
Yes, who else will organizing your financial, if not you? That is, the distribution of which money was for the kitchen shopping, spending for clean up the house, transportation fee, etc. In my situation, my money only enough to buy food, that’s why I have to smartly choose the activity for me and my son, so that I have not paid any transportation fees. And, to tell the truth, this is the other stressful condition for me.
Single Parent Means Must Have Hiding Place For Crying!
Because single mom have a very heavy burden, they often cry. But do not let your children see you cry often. It’s okay if not often, because they can learn how to empathize with parent. And if its often it’s not good, because it leave the impression in the mind of the child that his parents regretted her/his life, it is not good for the child's psychological development. Thus, the hiding place to cry is definitely needed.
Single Parent Means No Idealism!
Especially in the case of home hygiene and personal appearance. It’s is important to be clean. But no need to be too neat. Take your time to do the most important thing. Forget about what others say about your house or your appearance, just do your work and educate your child. Make your child happy and smart, that’s your priority as a single mom.
This 4 days experiences really make me impressed with the single parents, especially single mom. They steadfastly take on the role and duties. Many of them be single parent for a lifetime, only to care about their children. And many of them give up and eventually seek a husband/wife to share the burden. And for all single moms who read this article… respect!
Shared on: Work in Progress Wednesday #9